February 19, 1993

GAY PEOPLE'S CHRONICLE

Page 27

Entertainment

A valuable resource on lesbian spouse abuse

Violent Betrayal:

Partner Abuse in Lesbian Relationships by Claire M. Renzetti

Sage Publications, 1992, paperback

Reviewed by Ann Burlingham

What problems do battered lesbians face? How should their needs be met? Sociology professor Claire Renzetti's study of 100 women helps answer these questions. Although Renzetti is careful to point out the limitations of her study--the sample includes few working-class women or women of color--this book should be a valuable tool for those in the field of family violence.

The types of abuse lesbians face, from slapping and punching, threats, destruction of property to ridicule, isolation, and threats of suicide, are similar to and as varied as those heterosexual women suffer. The dynamics in the battering relationship are similar, with a victim whose main reasons for staying are her love for her abuser and the hope that the violence will stop, and a batterer who is dependent on and jealous of her partner. A power imbalance between the two is usually present, though Renzetti found it hard to codify, rather than the rigidly defined gender roles usually present in abusive heterosexual relationships.

Over half the women reported the first incident within six months; more than three quarters were abused within the first year. Abusers adapted their abuse to the specific situations and vulnerabilities of their partners, including threats of "outing" and accusations of political incorrectness.”

Battered lesbians who sought help often encountered overt homophobia, especially from police. Most turned first to friends, who often denied the problem. Those who approached their families usually did receive help, but many either were not out to

their families or were otherwise unwilling to ask for their help. Counselors were cited as responding best, often helping the victim identify the situation as abusive. Many women were reluctant to approach a battered women's shelter, some fearing a homophobic response, others because the safe house's location was known in the lesbian community (four, in fact, reported that their partners worked at the local shelter).

Renzetti outlines the responses that would help victims of lesbian partner abuse, including specific outreach by family violence programs and ongoing education for their staff, education for medical, police, and other emergency workers (she cites useful material from the Minnesota Coalition for Battered Women). She urges counselors to recognize that self-defensive behavior by the victim does not make the abuse "mutual," and to focus more on helping the victim, rather than trying to keep the relationship intact. (She found that counselors more often focused on "fixing" the lesbian relationship, despite findings that the cycle of violence, once started, is unlikely to end within any relationship.) What women wanted most, however, was for their friends to believe them, help them to name their abuse, and to offer emotional support.

Although there have been a number of articles in recent years on battering in gay and lesbian relationships, this seems to be the first book on lesbian battering since Naming the Violence: Speaking Out About Lesbian Battering, which was published by Seal Press in 1986. Violent Betrayal is longawaited and necessary information for those confronting this violence, containing both useful profiles of battering situations and pointers toward responses and further study. Naming the Violence remains the most accessible introduction to lesbian battering, but both books are valuable resources.

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